Tuesday 23 April 2013

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Regards. 
Fatty. 

China Town!


Fatties!

It has almost become synonymous to everyone that if you want good food for cheap at unholy hours, you go to your local China Town. No matter what anyone says, they always seem to have the best food, worst service and the cheapest price. The Chinese way of cooking is fast, using high pressure stoves and the all-famous wok! In the olden days they used to use coal to fire their woks, with the temperature almost impossible to manage their technique of quick cooking and flavors ingredients with fermented sauces. The fermented bean and fish sauces are the core flavours Chinese food. They also like the French like to incorporate alcohol in their cook. We know anything with booze and following french cooking is good. 

The oldest China Town in is Manila, the most famous probably San Francisco, New York or London. My favorite, has to be our dear Yawarat. Famed for its gold shops, gun shops and your occasional textile trader, Yawarat is where it’s at. Some of the oldest families who now rule Thailand have come from there. The food, I dare anyone to challenge; is some of the best in Thailand. Driving down with an old-timer almost every corner is famed for something or the other. The best noodle to the best tandoori chicken. They can tell you where all the goodies we eat and take for granted actually all stemmed from here.

On this of all days Mr. X had told me about a place with amazing fresh seafood, done in a very traditional Chinese style. See, Me and Mr .X had recently taken a trip to Penang in Malaysia where I had the chance of showing him REAL Chinese food! I sense his ego bruised but belly full he had nothing to say. Today however was his revenge. A notion of: anything you and do I can do better. To accompany us of this eventful day was Mr. H, an international man of mystery. Much cannot be written about him because of his super star status so let’s just leave it at that.




The traditional Chinese restaurant necessities. Cheap “MADE IN CHINA” Bowls to put your bones, ears and other extremities you decided not to eat. An interesting addition to sauce selection is Thai seafood sauce. Possibly the best combination of flavors to ever go with seafood. A spicy, sweet, and slightly sour sauce made by what I assume to be many green things, a seafood dinner without this is not a seafood dinner at all.


 Oyster Egg
A deep fried egg mixed with corn flour and water. Some spring onions added in for good measure. The sheer size of these oysters are mind boggling. They say oysters are an aphrodisiac. That could explain why there were so many Men with families/mistresses in the restaurant. The egg is fluffy and superbly seasoned. The oysters are fresh, huge and sweet. Like Viagra on steroids these will send blood rushing to all the important organs. 
 Fresh prawns steamed to perfection
Simple. Elegant. These bundles of joy are best eaten with the green magical seafood sauce. The natural sweetness of the prawns with the sauce is just divine. The prawns are so fresh you can taste the ocean in every bite.
Warning: If you are not skilled at peeling shrimp watch out. The heads will squirt out a strong smelling liquid with the force and surprise of  a mistimed ejaculation. 
 Mud Crab Steamed with Egg Whites 
This according to our waitress/prison warden is a small crab (she must be blind because it was massive). A unusual combination for a standard Chinese restaurant. We are usually used to eating the traditional curry crab or crab with black pepper. This, however is far better the both of those combined. The egg white preserves the sweetness of the crab with out corrupting the flavor  Absolutely brilliant. I would dare to say this is the best way to eat fresh crab. 
 Stir-Fry Shark Fin with Bean Sprouts and Egg
Usually this much talked about and frowned upon dish is done in a soup. This stir-fry however gives great justice to the great white who valiantly gave his life for my deliciousness. The bean sprouts add some texture and the eggs just bring the dish together perfectly. This dish is worth eating day in day out. But I am told there are not enough sharks to provide this, so it will remain a china town delicacy. 
Suckling Pig 
This for any decent human being is like watching porn! The crispy roasted skin is just plain sexy! The fat is crispy and naturally flavored  Eaten with a Chinese pancake and sweet sauce.
This, ladies and gentleman, boys and girls is what living and eating is all about.
Juicy, soft, fatty, crispy and delicious. Every criteria you judge any dish this has all in one!
Best part to enjoy are the tongue and ears!

This place is charming. The people are loud. The food is fresh. The atmosphere is awful, the service is bad. But if you want food at its purest this is where you come. The sink to wash your hands in next to the kitchen where you can hear woks burning, knifes cutting the occasional chef singing Gangam style and a rat finding something yummy on the floor and making a run for it.


Saturday 6 April 2013

Easy Peasy Japanesey

Ogu Ogu 


Fatties!

"Concept Sake Bar." I'm reading the article infront of me and thinking WHAT THE HELL IS THAT! I was sitting with my favourite foodie drinking caffeine and consuming other addictive substances when I asked, what does that mean! She comes from a more sophisticated background than me. Lived in a city famed for more than just transgenders and Hangover 2. She was a proper food aficionado. i was certain she would know.

Ms. Foodie tried her very best to explain to me what a concept sake bar meant. I turned to her and replied, well it's just plain bad English (I know you critics of my writing out there are laughing. Me criticising writing is like a Thai policeman refusing a bribe! Just ridiculous). But I just did not get it. You have 'A' concept that is a sake bar. You can't have a concept sake bar. Putting it down to just good old spell check I moved on.

I have been appalled recently with these stupid, nonsense, discretion of Japanese food. Flooding the Bangkok food scene like the plague, they title themselves 'fusion'. As an Indian uncle once cleverly told me, "fusion is just confusion"(shook his head and said it with a heavy indian accent!). AND IT IS! We have a sudden influx of American-ise, or as I call it bastard-ise, sushi bars serving shit fish, using no skill and sprinkling tempura on everything and calling it "crunchy".

People will say, they're being creative, innovative even. A natural progression of cusines is refinement. I get it. I love the occasional avacado and chili combo. But it's too much. Readers of my blog will see my previous post about authentic sushi in Bangkok. Sushi. These places are few and far between. Sadly they are also pricing everyone out of the market. 100USD is nothing at these places. It is only for the rich and shameless as the rest of BKK eats truffle oil sashimi and volcano rolls. Instagram's it and then claims to love japanese food.

Jiro Ono the master of sushi would be rolling around screaming if he came to some places in Bangkok.

Fusion has taken over to become the norm. Lost is the great simple clean flavours of Japanese cuisine. The quality of the produce is replaced with mayonnaise and truffle oil!! I still can't believe it. Truffle oil on raw fish. Next thing you know the French will be eating their Foie Gras with soya sauce!

All is not lost however. Mr X who has already been featured in this blog told me of a place in Ploenchit. A new 5 star Japanese hotel had open there (the Okura). Famed around the world, I was told, was this hotel's sushi. In Bangkok they had brought Yamazato. I knew Mr.X, with his appetite  for expensive food, was going to make me go here. Calling my credit cards to beg them to extend my limit, borrowing from motocycle drivers and my dish washer, he called and said. 'No. It's next to dean and deluca. Called Ogu Ogu'. Sounding a lot like batman I was mystified yet intrigued at this new place.

So we set off to this 'Concept Sake Bar'.

Upon arriving I found all the staff to be very friendly, beautifully dressed and their command of English was brilliant. I decided today I would not break out my flawless Thai and just quiz them in English. I wanted this place to fail. Fusion should be distroyed along with Thai Taxi drivers.

We were given the menus and I was a little taken back. Every section was quite small. Gordon Ramsey use to say 10 things on a menu, only 10 things can go wrong. 100 things on a menu, 100 things can go wrong. The notion being, less is always more in food. Your kitchen will be better prepared, your staff will have better knowledge of the products and the food will always be better. Repetition and consistency is the key for any restaurant. Small menus allow for this and also allows for refinement of dishes.

We saw some amazing things; creative, delicious looking (I love menus with pictures. It always makes me want to order 5 more things) and so well thought out. Dishes kept their Japanese essence, but were taken one step further. The chef was bold yet respectful. Age old traditons and flavors were kept but he wanted to just push the envelope further.

 Japanese fried chicken with whisky and soya sauce 
This dish pretty much sums up this restaurant. It's a traditional Japanese Karage. Fried juicy thigh pieces of chicken usually accompanied with soy sauce. They have added Japanese whisky to add some smokey and sweet notes to the dish. Just brilliant. They have not gone over the top. Simple, elegant and above all still sticking to the fundamentals. 
 Fried lotus root 
A healthier version of french fries. A nice companion with beer. 
 THE BEST DAMN KATSU CURRY RICE I'VE EVER EATEN 
THIS my friends, is just brilliant. Absolutely brilliant. One of the few places I've been to that has given me a food boner. This, was like a porn star style erection. I can close my eyes and still taste the flavours. I used the curry as my own dipping sauce. Words really can't describe this dish. GO Eat it! Orgasm and you will understand.   
 Volcano
A brilliant way of presenting one of America's biggest disgrace to sushi! This dish is everything I hate about fusion. The traditional Japanese flavours are all but lost. In its place is chili, mayonnaise and some other madness. However. If you are one of those fools, who's palette is made of tar and road kill. This is perfect for you. You can Instagram it, and brag to all your friends how this was the best Japanese food 'EVER!!!' You will go to food hell. But hey. It's a personal choice. 
Steamed Korobuta with cabbage 
This dish was quite a surprise. For a place that is experimenting with flavours, this was quite bland. Letting the ingredients and technique of cooking speak for themselves. A bit odd. Sticking out like a sore thumb, I didn't know whether to love it or hate it. A part of me loves anything to do with pig. Another part of me was angry. Angry because the dish before was a ridiculous mix of flavours, and yet  this was flavourless. Were they lazy? Or was this just so good even someone who loves to meddle couldn't have the heart to meddle? 

All in all this place rocks. It's trendy and hip without being pretentious and stuffy. Service is amazing, all smiles. The service here is what Thailand was famed for years ago. The food is good. Even this obese over opinionated blogger must admit the 'Volcano' after all said and done was one of the best i have eaten. All the food is just perfect. I am not a sake man, but judging from the red faces and laughter from the tables around me, it was a good place for that as well.

Concept sake bar. Funny name. But good food.