Brunch.
Bangkok has lost its mind recently. Everyone claiming they
have the best Brunch spot in town. The high so’s are instgraming the shit
out of the champagne filled oyster indulged Sundays. The Hipsters are
facebooking new boutique pastry shops with ridicules French names.
Me starting this blog has made me susceptable to such god-awful
questions like, Where is my fav brunch place? Hours of discussions and opiated argument’s
with my foodie friends, chefs and well lets be honest my bedroom wall. I have
an answer, however I have to explain a few things before I give you my answer.
Firstly I hate brunch. For me brunch is at a 5 star hotel
where I tactically size up the buffet line. Mentally calculate the cost of the
goods, and systematically eat 5 times the amount I have paid. Anything else
well, is just silly. Bangkok is full of places with crappy poached eggs, hollandaise
sauce that taste like shit and a combination of other “brunch like items/fusion
nonsense” that is just unappetizing. It is however hugely trendy. Want to
impress a girl in this city, take her to brunch. Want to get 100 more instagram
stalkers take photos of brunch. IF you WANT TO BE COOL! JUST BRUNCH!
This pretentious and often ridicules idea that there is time
in between breakfast and lunch to eat rather then sleep is just stupid. Places
pray on the foolish wannabes that sit in these places sipping their free trade
coffee eating garbage and feeling special.
HOWEVER. All my little fatties all is not lost. Salvation has
some in the form of 3
Scandinavian bartenders and their famously pretty all male
team.
A classmate of mine who was working in London had told me he
was moving back to Bangkok. He was tall dark and handsome. A luk krung ( half
thai half western) that tickles every Thai persons light bulbs. He was pretty
and talented. Since we were in school together his passion and dedication were evident.
Working in some of the best kitchens in London gave his the ammunition to fuel
his passion. He told me 3 Swedish guys were opening a coffee shop in Sathron
and he was going to join them.
I have 3 Swedish friend. Who like most swedes love their
coffee. Could it be? Only one way to find out. Like all things in life alcohol
is the best way to get information. The Americans have waterboarding I have
jaggermister. A small kidnapping and few jagger bombs later, It was true. The
brains behind some of the best cocktail bars in Bangkok, The guys who have
charmed and intoxicated many screaming women hurling panties, dignity and virginity. The 3 dudes you call upon if you need your martini shaken not stirred.
ARE OPENING A COFFEE SHOP.
Have they lost their bloody mind? My poor friend was going
to end up working in a sinking ship. Run buy 3 Swedish Vikings without a
compass or GPS. What do I do? Watch him fail or by all means give this place a
shot. Maybe set it on fire so they can claim insurance.
So I went. I like all of you will know; Love my food. Real
food. Greasy, friend, thick juicy meat and mash potatoes. Anything else is well a waste of time.
I stumbled upon a small quaint place. The décor is very
Scandinavian. Lots of wood and clean lines, I say my hellos and sit down. The menu
is small. Lots of green healthy stuff. After puking in my mouth a little I
decided lets give this healthy living a whirl. I was suggested a drink call
green, a coffee, pouched eggs and a pulled pork sandwich. To some this may seem
excessive. This was my snack as i had already had lunch ( mans got to eat) . The drink was, well green. The swedes have told
me that I am the un healthiest thing in Mc Donaldnas. So maybe this will help.
I was grossed out. The smell to me was revolting. But… the taste. Absolutely
unreal. Every sip was like doing lines of cocaine. Giving you a buzz of
freshness. Like waking up amongst freshly cut grass. The poached eggs, were
well suveed. Chatin my buddy and chef was telling me the wonders of suveeing
food. I think the idea of cooking in a plastic bag, is well. Fucked up. But the
texture and the flavor combinations he put on the plate was delectable. Light
and fresh. It was like eating from a farm on the countryside. His elegant mix
of vegetables, dressings and condiments were spectacular. I found the eggs a
little bland but after eating them with everything on the plate I could see his
idea behind it.
Then came the second best part of the afternoon. Pulled pork
sandwich. Many attempt this delectable dish. ALL FAIL. Pork is usually dry. The
bread is shit, there is no sauce no relish nothing. This sandwich people is
fantastic!!! Homemade bread with a sour hint. A cabbage relish to die for. The
pork. OH THE PORK! Fantastic. Cooked for ages, seasoned to perfection. I dream
of this dish at least once a week. For a
blogger with insomnia my dreams are precious.
The best part. Well it’s the coffee. I cant explain why its
good. I don’t understand coffee. Mine is usually full of milk and sugar. This. Well
this is some other kind of black gold. Have a cup of their coffees with no
sugar no milk. Ask them why its done this way. You will too start a food blog
and write about it.
So have I changed my opinion about brunch? NO. I still think
its ridicules. Have these guys made the best brunch place in Bangkok. Well yes.
The coffee is a boutique roast. Their machine cost as much as a house. Their
idea and execution is immaculate. These swedes were renowned for making some of
the best cocktails. To give it up and do this is. Well its like me becoming a
vegetarian. And liking it.
So you want to know where my favorite brunch place is.
Rocket coffee bar.
